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  • 52 - The no-pants life

    52 - The no-pants life

    25/01/2018 Duração: 50min

    Today we have an awesome guest on the podcast and she evangelizes about a life where you wear no pants! This is a returnee guest, from our most popular episode ever!! That super famous episode is titled “Sex Prison.” If you haven’t listened to it, you should. Also, can you f%&%%$%^^! your way out of a depression? And, we learn about how Burning Man is really the catalyst of Alllll divorce. Cat or baby? Listen on!

  • 51 - Deuces

    51 - Deuces

    12/01/2018 Duração: 01h20min

    Tracy Nguyen, comedienne extraordinaire joins us! Not a divorcée, but veteran of enough relationships to share in our cynicism. We address the big questions: can one have too many vibrators? Should relationships end at three years? Is art all about sex or all about death? PICK A SIDE! Tracy shares the history of Catholicism in Vietnam and her boat times. Plus an all new edition of Annette's an Ignorant Dumb Bitch.

  • 50 - Stay the fuck home

    50 - Stay the fuck home

    04/01/2018 Duração: 52min

    This episode gets poetic IRL. Annette gets inspired and recites poetry to our readers. Also, would you like to know how to go on a hike and not get murdered? You certainly would. Definitely, learn how data science is used at Tinder. Listen on to learn what “Me gusta cuando callas” means to your romantic relationship.

  • 49 - Property is More Important Than People

    49 - Property is More Important Than People

    21/12/2017 Duração: 01h27s

    We are joined by smokey-voiced comic and pre-Raphaelite beauty Shelbi Evans, who tells us about growing up in Texas, what comes from abstinence-only education (spoiler: babies!), and her adorable parents. We also ask the important questions: who are you if you aren't yourself. What wasn't published in Anne Frank's diary? Someone tries to murder us. Well, someone tried to open the door with unknown aims. Plus an all new Annette's an Ignorant Dumb Bitch!

  • 48 - So … If we can start the sex now

    48 - So … If we can start the sex now

    15/12/2017 Duração: 01h12min

    The microphone stand flew away! and Paola is wearing snake skin boots. In this episode, our intrepid hostesses discuss racism against hair color and brain eating amoebas. Our guest, Damian, tells us about his long periods of not thinking about anything and key ways to interact with his hair dresser. He also enlightens us about how to meet people IRL. And, we learn about dating in the US vs. AU. Wanna hear it? So … listen and learn.

  • 47 - Happy Divorce-iversary!

    47 - Happy Divorce-iversary!

    08/12/2017 Duração: 30min

    We're baaaack! We’re sorry we’ve been away so long! We’ll never do it again, we swear (maybe). We’ve missed you and we know you missed us! How have you been living your lives without our advice to guide you? What, did you realize no one else can make your decisions for you, embrace the reality of that which you cannot change, and take concrete steps to change that which is within your control? Gross! What should you say when meeting up with an ex? Should you subject a new and fragile relationship to the hardships of travel? How do you tell that dude you want to travel with him? Plus, Spanish politics!

  • 46 - Special Hugs Buddy

    46 - Special Hugs Buddy

    13/09/2017 Duração: 01h15min

    Woe unto the straight man dating in San Francisco (or is the problem his changing priorities? Or his terminology for fuckbuddies?) Ardin, comedian, host of fellow Mutiny Radio podcast The Night Space and barista extraordinaire joins us to discuss the trials and travails of dating on both coasts and his sitcom ideas. Paola shares a story about larval divorcées on Tinder. We also get a call (apologies for the audio quality - if you can’t stand it skip to 29:30)! Get ready to learn all about the medical advances being hidden from you by Trump media. Do phone books still exist? And an ignorant dumb bitch question about lesbian bed death.

  • 45 - Leather Puppy

    45 - Leather Puppy

    06/09/2017 Duração: 01h02min

    Bottoms, tops, subs, doms, sadists, rope buddies, leather puppies - learn what some of these are but not all of them on this episode! Today we have very special guest Maha, here to correct our misconceptions about BDSM, whether one should enter into a relationship because of how good the sex is, 50 Shades of Grey, your 30s, and Arabic. Join us to be taught, terrified, and maybe a little titillated!

  • 44 - I love you I know

    44 - I love you I know

    29/08/2017 Duração: 01h32min

    We love our guest Scarlett! And not just because she compliments the everlovin' shit out of us (though that certainly doesn't hurt). Join us as we learn together about her ideal wedding, Star Wars, the difference between Mexican and Irish Catholicism, shit wine, and feminist bullshit. What is homonormativity? How can you make nachos even better? Is the self and its apparent separation from the rest of existence an illusion? All this and also some other stuff! Featuring a double-bonus edition of Annette's a Dumb Ignorant Bitch - 2 Lesbians answering 2 different questions!

  • 43 - More like Game of Shut the Fuck Up

    43 - More like Game of Shut the Fuck Up

    24/08/2017 Duração: 33min

    Paola may be pregnant, so listen on. AND! Paola and Annette discuss the 'Merica putting so much pressure on what people do for a living. Do you lose your human worth if you don't have an occupation that pays money? Should the first question that is asked on a date be about salary? Also, super exciting … um ... Dragons. Our hostesses share their expert media criticism on Game of Thrones. And we end on Paola's hot take on dogs and babies. which one of these ladies would freak out at the sight of a husky puppy? and which one would pet a person?

  • 42 - Nonworkers of the World, Unite!

    42 - Nonworkers of the World, Unite!

    15/08/2017 Duração: 01h02min

    We have a guest again! Hear someone else's voice for a change of pace! Joining us today is Arjun, fresh from the Democratic Socialists of America conference in Chicago and full of revolutionary (or incremental?) spirit. How did he veer red? What does Obamacare matter? How can one scare bougie people AND achieve solidarity with homeless? Arjun talks to us about moving back to Michigan, multiple sclerosis, the importance of work to identity in American, and (of course!) dating. Plus, Paola plans the phone olympics and we talk plastic surgery. What's wrong with us physically? (Not enough time for mentally or spiritually)

  • 41 - Join Tech to Be Pretty

    41 - Join Tech to Be Pretty

    08/08/2017 Duração: 23min

    We didn't want to leave y'all for a week without us, even though Paola is in away in Seattle and Annette has shows, that we delayed salsa in order to record this (dear reader, fret not, immediately afterwards we salsa'd like motherfuckers). SO MUCH advice packed into this short ep you're gonna think we're Oprahs. Career advice focused on what YOU care about - feelin' pretty! Should you do steroids? How to motivate yourself to workout - think about making yourself less murderable! Quite a bit of fitness on this one, as if that is what our lives revolve around... ha. Also learn about ladyland on all new edition of Annette's a Dumb Ignorant Bitch! Plus, Why We Hate Being Single: a rant.

  • 40 - Soulless Cycle

    40 - Soulless Cycle

    01/08/2017 Duração: 47min

    Life is a soulless cycle, but we can distract ourselves. Ready to learn SO MANY THINGS? We have amazing facts and stories from the history of weightlifting, lesbians, our superhero alter egos, ghosts, ponytails, and art collecting. Plus advice about roommates and nutrition, the latter of which may or may not be related to shit getting hella scatological. All this AND a new Dumb Ignorant Bitch question.

  • 39 - Murder or Apples

    39 - Murder or Apples

    19/07/2017 Duração: 01h09min

    For a change of pace we discuss strategies to trap a man. Problem: are any men worth trapping? Or should one go for a more humane, catch-and-release strategy? Also, when is too soon to bring up sexual compatibility? When is too late? We work through a lot of our Catholic guilt in this one AND for the kids, a special section on word problems. These chicks love math! Plus, a dumb ignorant question about how ladies hit on each other. Got questions? Email [email protected]

  • 38 - The Divorcee Whisperer

    38 - The Divorcee Whisperer

    04/07/2017 Duração: 55min

    Aaaannnndddd Annette is back from Greece. YAY. Paola is really excited to have her eloquent friend back to talk to. Thoughout Annette’s absence, Paola languished through the streets of San Francisco. Annette, drops some knowledge about Sappho, a greek poet from the island of Lesbos. Could this be the origin of all the Lesbians? This episode’s guest is the very charming Arya, who tells about her public service to divorced men. She knows exactly how to extract all their sadness. Curious about what her secret is? Listen on!

  • 37 - Double Token

    37 - Double Token

    27/06/2017 Duração: 17min

    This is a short one, to tide you over. But worry not, we will be back next week with the normal amount of chatter & advice to fill your earholes so that you can't think too much, staving off existential angst for at least a little while longer (that's why everyone listens to podcasts right?). For a change of pace, we answer questions and rag on straight dudes! But seriously, we answer a plethora of YOUR advice questions, if plethora means like 2 or 3, which I'm not going to look up. Can a straight dude be sexually satisfied without putting his dick in a puss? Why is straight sex the worst sex (objectively! According to science!)? And what's up with lesbians and processing? Also, who's the bigger token? (It's Paola, but each of us is a token in our own special way).

  • 35 - Email Bankruptcy

    35 - Email Bankruptcy

    13/06/2017 Duração: 58min

    More on coregasms and fitness fantasies from our two hostesses. This episode, we have a sagacious guest who tells us how he summoned the detective gods to find the truth that would win him a Divorce! Can an unorganized inbox really end a marriage? What should be your last meal before you declare divorce? And what is the correct winking etiquette? We learn what the life train is like when it no longer follows the set path of train tracks … derailing, so much better. This and more, now, listen on!

  • 34 - The End To Racism

    34 - The End To Racism

    06/06/2017 Duração: 35min

    Paola and Annette discover that they have a podcast where they explore very important existential questions. In a previous episode, the two divorcee hosts engaged in a push up contest and they disclose the winner during this episode. Other topics in this episode include: best retirement strategies, when to take a shot before leaving the house, equality in the skin color of cows, the solution to racism, and worm-operated-lesbian holograms that transcend time but not space. Hit us up at [email protected] about these topics or with any question you'd like our expert advice on.

  • 33 - Teddy Bear Tinder Pic

    33 - Teddy Bear Tinder Pic

    31/05/2017 Duração: 47min

    Ugh, relationships. Gross. We're not only sick of relationships, but sick of romance being a goto topic of conversation. Does our aversion make sense given that this podcast is often about relationships? Does it matter that we would have fire tinder profiles if we were about that life? We divorce ourselves from these concerns and propose conversation alternates - eyeliner, exercise, the nature of cups, sleeping situations, and murder. Plus an all-new edition of "Annette's A Dumb Ignorant Bitch" - about competitiveness. In what feat of strength do you totally own your partner? What's your sleep situation? How much of your sleeping arrangement is or isn't based on the avoidance of murder? Hit us up at [email protected] about these topics or with any question you'd like our expert advice on.

  • 32 - Hot Butches for Middle-Aged Moms

    32 - Hot Butches for Middle-Aged Moms

    23/05/2017 Duração: 51min

    We are joined by very special guest Liz, who is not a divorcée but nonetheless has some pretty interesting things to say about marriage, especially the one she's in. Is an ideal marriage one in which you can sit together on the couch, drink, and bitch about your respective girlfriends? Also, Paola is concerned about her hair, Annette very straightfully tries to put sexuality in boxes, and both finally admit that this podcast is pretty much gay propaganda. Are you a hot butch? Contact us to get hooked up!

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