Intimate Interactions


Improve your relationships, get confident asking for what you really want, and have more intimate, satisfying sex! These lessons from non monogamy and consensual kink can improve any relationship and help you connect more with yourself and others. Check out


  • World Class Success or Utter Failure (Wicked)

    World Class Success or Utter Failure (Wicked)

    24/10/2020 Duração: 44min

    Depression is a serious mental illness that affects most of us at some point in our lives through our friends, loved ones, or personally. Lots of folks have some experience of depression during their teen years, but what if that depths-of-the-ocean kraken never went away? What if there was an ongoing lingering threat that you could slip back into it at any time? My experience of depression has been sort of like that, an ongoing, cyclic struggle with depression that’s worse in the winter and then a little easier to manage when I’m out in the sun. I cope with therapy, UV light treatment, meds, and a host of strategies implemented from therapy. Currently, my depression is peeking through all of that as it’s January. Friends on meds have suggested I increase my dose in the winter, which is a great idea. Today, I have one of my older friends, wicked, on the show. Her experience with depression isn’t that different from mine, but I’ll let her tell you about it herself. Resources Unhelpful Thinking Sylte https://he

  • Chronic Illness at an Orgy, A Post Mortem (Jazz Goldman)

    Chronic Illness at an Orgy, A Post Mortem (Jazz Goldman)

    17/10/2020 Duração: 49min

    Jazz Goldman is back to talk about an orgy they invited me to at which we got to have fun sexy times. We talk about best practices, how we sometimes suspend best practices, and not being too hard on ourselves. I process my feelings about having chronic illness and about not noticing an allergic reaction that happened to me at an orgy. While you can’t control what life throws at you, you can control how you respond to it and the people you choose to support and surround yourself with. Fortunately for me, I surrounded myself with the very best people who were incredibly understanding, kind, and compassionate. Jazz even helps me cultivate more self compassion. Since we were both returning from a hot tub session, a demanding orgy, and then showering and getting ready for bed, we’re both pretty tired and dopey. While it picks up later in the session, I decided to do my nails. It may not seem like the best life decision to choose to do it while recording a podcast, but I wanted to get my thoughts down while the emo

  • Monogamish Relationship Anarchist (Wicked)

    Monogamish Relationship Anarchist (Wicked)

    10/10/2020 Duração: 54min

    Wicked is back to talk about sexual scripting, relationship anarchy, butt sex, and friends with benefits. We talk about people not being need fulfillment machines, how damaging scripting can be, and how liberating writing our own scripts is. Wicked helps us dispel myths that relationship anarchists are always non monogamous - she’s a perfect example of a mongamous or more recently monogamish relationship anarchist. Let’s hear it straight from the Wicked’s mouth on Intimate Interactions.

  • Art, Artist, and Patron (Sophia Sky)

    Art, Artist, and Patron (Sophia Sky)

    03/10/2020 Duração: 47min

    Sophia Sky invites me to her bedroom to podcast about the subjectivity and intimacy of art. How does are create intimacy between the art subject and the viewer or for that matter between viewers? We’ll try not to be too all over the place but… no promises. We also talk about Sophia’s passion for art and sexuality that has in part led her to become the director of pan eros foundation, a non profit organization that focuses on celebrating and cultivating sexuality through education and the arts. Aside from the erotic gallery in the historic pioneer square neighbourhood of Seattle, Pan Eros is also responsible for Consent Academy and Seattle Erotic Arts Festival. Let’s dive into the intimacy of art with Sophia Sky now on Intimate Interactions. When and how did you first take stewardship of Pan Eros foundation? When you think about art, how would you describe the kind of art that gets you most excited- what effect or achievement makes it art for you? What relationship is there between the subject described

  • A COVID-19 Longhauler Speaks (Intimacy)

    A COVID-19 Longhauler Speaks (Intimacy)

    28/09/2020 Duração: 46min

    If you'd like to do so and can afford a few bucks, come support me at and throw as little as one dollar my way. If you're able to do so, it all helps no matter how small. It's very appreciated. Thank-you. First, how much COVID-19 is out there? “It’s now been more than a month since she started experiencing symptoms, and she’s still battling a lingering headache, cough and fatigue.” (from May) "She's had a fever, she said, for more than 100 days.” (from June) “"COVID-19 can result in prolonged illness even among persons with milder outpatient illness, including young adults," the report's authors wrote.” (from July)

  • Gender Sorcery and Mental Health Meds (Wicked)

    Gender Sorcery and Mental Health Meds (Wicked)

    26/09/2020 Duração: 01h11min

    Today wicked is back to touch on career and gender stuff. What does success or failure look like in the mind of a depressive? How does career play into that? Gender also plays an interesting role in depression as it informs your sense of community and isolation. Body language is powerful, and isolation in small communities can be fatal. Outside of secondary sex characteristics like scent and lines of the body, almost all of gender is abstract and constructed from the clothes we wear to most of the behaviours we socialize as evidenced by differing behaviours among sexes in different societies. Some societies recognize a third gender and have done for millenia. Others have fewer boxes in which they categorize themselves. Fortunately, more and more countries are understanding that cosmetic modification of children’s genitals is probably a really bad thing that leads to mental health problems later in life, and that gender affirmation surgery is literally a life saving procedure. I think we discuss three notions

  • From Catholic Church to Sri Aurobindo Ashram (My Dad)

    From Catholic Church to Sri Aurobindo Ashram (My Dad)

    19/09/2020 Duração: 01h03min

    I’ll begin with an aside about a cat. I mention rescue cat 27705 who is a foster kitty with black and white tuxedo colouration and an incredibly sweet disposition found malnourished and abandoned on a wooden pallet that has gained 50% of its body weight in under two weeks with me. Still underweight and almost 11 pounds, this cat plays fetch, is easy to pick up, and meows at me while I’m recording these introductions. Now to the introduction. My father like most humans is many things. He grew up Roman Catholic but commit apostasy and after travelling and soul searching decided to follow a spiritual path in an ashram in South India, the one in Puducherry specifically. If you’ve read Life of Pi, the ashram’s pool after which the protagonist is named is one in which my father has taken at least one swim. The ashram has been accused of being cultish before, lead by two leaders, one called Aurobindo Ghose after which I derive my middle name and my sister derives part of her first name. He is known to the ashramites

  • Making Sex Positive Events Happen (Jazz Goldman)

    Making Sex Positive Events Happen (Jazz Goldman)

    12/09/2020 Duração: 45min

    Jazz Goldman and I talk about organizing sex positive and sex-on-premises events. We talk about our love of these events and why we volunteer to do that work. We share our experiences in sex communities including the burner scene. I do use the word “literally” in this episode to mean “figuratively” which is now definitively one of the definitions of the word literally - don’t hate me for using modern English. I don’t like that the word has come to mean what it means, but I’m rolling with the punches. We also talk about the experience of organizing as mixed-race people of colour. What’s the difference between sex-on-premises and sex-positive in event organizing? What was going to your first sex event like? What do you like most about sex events? What kinds of sex-on-premises events exist in various cities you’ve been in? How does your experience as a non-binary femme affect your experience at sex-on-premises events? How does your experience as a Black person affect your experience at sex-on-pre

  • Self Expression and Self Relationship Repair (Yana Skorstengaard)

    Self Expression and Self Relationship Repair (Yana Skorstengaard)

    05/09/2020 Duração: 58min

    Hi, Intimates! We talk with Yana Skorstengaard again today about her thesis in art therapy. Her research reveals great results from programs for incarcerated folks. Programs involving art can create the kind of self expression and other communication skills necessary for functional relationships. Outside of programs within incarceration, there are also alternatives available to a very small number of incarcerated folks including indigenous healing lodges. While I acknowledge both she and I are settlers which is to say non-indigenous to this land, the success of the healing lodge programs and our inability to create more spaces like it is too important not to mention, so we’re going to go ahead and try in a flawed and somewhat self aware fashion. Strategies developed by indigenous peoples in relationship repair and accountability for harming other folks in society are often radically different in approach from European descended strategies like incarceration, and it's worth lifting up the voices and values of

  • Talking Group Sex while Feeding Birds (Jazz Goldman)

    Talking Group Sex while Feeding Birds (Jazz Goldman)

    29/08/2020 Duração: 51min

    This session discusses group sex while Jazz Goldman and I are walking around at the Reifel Bird Sanctuary feeding ducks and getting accosted by gaggles of geese. Nerdy aside - Occasionally those gaggles would form a skein or two, the word for a gaggle of geese in flight. Of course, both gaggles on the ground or water and skeins in the air can be called flocks of geese correctly. Back to group sex - we talk about the sights and sounds, our personal experiences, misconceptions, and favourite parts. We talk about the way we move through group sex spaces and the way those spaces move around us as people of colour and non binary gendered humans. What are some common misconceptions about group sex/orgies? What alternative options or opportunities do you see in group sex over one on one sex (not that it’s a competition)? What kinds of group sex are currently your favourite and why? What additional concerns do you have going into group sex situations that you

  • Launching into Podcasting (SB Divya, M Lafferty, A Stuart)

    Launching into Podcasting (SB Divya, M Lafferty, A Stuart)

    22/08/2020 Duração: 46min

    Happy Two Year Anniversary of Intimate Interactions Podcast! This is the current episode I'm publishing to my patreon feed that I decided I'd publish to my free feed early! ^.^ Remember all of my content publishes free but as a thank-you to my patreon subscribers, I offer early access to great content. What does it mean when you feel a sense of intimacy that isn’t reciprocal? Today I’d love to focus on an aspect of that question: what is intimacy in podcasting? Do you know me? Do you know things about me? Do you know things about me very few people in my day-to-day life know? I would say the answer to most of those questions is probably: somewhat. Usually knowing those things, experiencing that intimacy - it represents a connection. Usually we could both predict what the other would likely do, feel, and Get ready for some meta content, folks. I am honoured to introduce you to both: one of my favourite short fiction podcasts, and to the esteemed veteran podcasters that in my opinion use their voices to promot

  • Parenting in the 80s (My Father)

    Parenting in the 80s (My Father)

    21/08/2020 Duração: 01h07min

    My soon-to-be 70 year old father visited from India and had a trans-ischemic attack while here. He’s been sick for about four weeks since he got here and was sick before he came, so I felt a sense of urgency to get to know him better, document for my nieces, and to ask what questions I had. He speaks well and often chooses only to highlight predominantly`the positives which could be seen as editorializing the past, you know - what I’m doing right now by offering a forward - or alternatively choosing to see only the positives. While some might argue parents who feel they’ve made mistakes and focus only on the positive are avoiding accountability, I haven’t gotten that sense from him and choose to believe he’s trying to illustrate the importance of focusing on the positives. I’ve recently been trying hard to notice positives in my life more and have been finding the effects if nothing else, relieving. The world feels less dark. I feel more hopeful. Of course, I’m also medicated, and both have played roles in my

  • Triads, Group Relationships, and Groupsex (Jazz Goldman)

    Triads, Group Relationships, and Groupsex (Jazz Goldman)

    15/08/2020 Duração: 45min

    Jazz and I drive to the Reifel Bird Sanctuary for a fun day out and have a conversation about their experiences in group relationships like the Triad they were in during college. They discuss the needs of the individual versus those of the group (a la Spock, or if you prefer, the Three Musketeers or … insert maybe whatever French philosopher that inspired themes in that book here). They also discuss the benefits and drawbacks. Let’s talk group sex and triads, here on intimate interactions. What’s your experience with group sex? What do you like best about group sex?

  • No Longer an Imposter (Yana Skorstengaard)

    No Longer an Imposter (Yana Skorstengaard)

    08/08/2020 Duração: 59min

    Happy New Year, Intimates! It’s 2020, the year where “partying like it’s 2020” will likely mean turning in around 10:30 pm so you feel rested the next morning. Just kidding - it’s the year of hindsight, and even with perfect hindsight, people stay up later than they say they want to and experience more motivation to commit to hard things the further away they are. I’ve always found that a bit embarrassing personally - or perhaps as a species? New Years is a time of new beginnings, which brings us to Imposter Syndrome, one of those things from which many of us (myself included) suffer when starting something new or even after many years. Someone once said to me “imposter syndrome is colonialism” and it got a lot easier to take off the sweater vest that is imposter syndrome. I personally cope by reminding myself that people I respect chose for me to be where I am and since I respect them, I respect their opinion of what they saw in me. Which brings us to today where I made a podcast for all of 2019 and some of

  • Crime, Motivation, and Punishment During Crisis (Yana Skorstengaard)

    Crime, Motivation, and Punishment During Crisis (Yana Skorstengaard)

    08/08/2020 Duração: 45min

    Do deterrents work? If you make a deterrent awful enough, does it stop crime? Has capital crime ended where the death penalty exists if you don’t count executions as murders? Yana, a criminology researcher from the University of Ottawa is here to help us unpack these things. Since it’s six figures per prisoner per year in our current system, and if these very expensive, punitive deterrents don’t successfully deter crime, what does? What programs exist that reduce criminals reoffending - that’s called recidivism. So how can we take people who have committed a crime and have them not commit crimes anymore - that’s called rehabilitation. We pose the question: does knowing you’ll be caught for certain deter crime? And if so, with technology evolving, how easily can we catch people and then offer a small consequence that is enough to deter but not so much it eats through public funds in the wasteful, harmful way our current punitive system does. Keep in mind we’re spending this much on prisons while simultaneously

  •  Growing up in Vancouver in the 60s (My Dad)

    Growing up in Vancouver in the 60s (My Dad)

    01/08/2020 Duração: 59min

    My father visited from India recently. He turns 70 in 9 days. With chronic fatigue, heart attacks, and trans-ischemic attacks - they’re like ministrokes - I felt a sense of urgency to connect with him. I invited him to podcast about his childhood as it seemed like a good way to learn more about him, and I think it’s important to humanize a parent as just another person where you get the opportunity. These recordings of my parents, in this case of my father, serve as a record for my nieces but also insights about how I became who I became. This recording provided me an opportunity to get to know someone important to my formative years and also still important to me today. My father was sick when he arrived to visit and four weeks later was still sick so we recorded through the coughing because it seemed like the best opportunity I was going to get.

  • Coaching for Pleasurable Anal Sex (Jazz Goldman)

    Coaching for Pleasurable Anal Sex (Jazz Goldman)

    25/07/2020 Duração: 58min

    Because giving anal sex is my primary form of penetrative sexual expression, it became essential for me to make it easier and pleasurable for others. Coaching someone who is receiving anal sex is more an art than a science, but there are certain skills that are useful. You can also coach yourself while you’re receiving anal sex, something I do frequently given my experience coaching others. Another skill I forget to mention in the episode is using one hand (or two) to hold the shaft of the insertable be it a dildo or a penis to shorten it. It’s a great way to control penetration depth on the road to full insertion. The other option if you aren’t using a penis is to use smaller insertables at first. I find the interruption of changing insertables though to be maybe too disruptive of the experience for me, so I currently prefer a bigger insertable with a hand around the base for when I want more. There is also such a thing as too deep in my experience giving and receiving. Some recta (or rectums) are only so lo

  • 110 - Grief and Emotional Intelligence in a Pandemic (Yana Skorstengaard)

    110 - Grief and Emotional Intelligence in a Pandemic (Yana Skorstengaard)

    25/07/2020 Duração: 01h01min

    Life Interrupted. I think that’s the title of the chapter of the memoirs I’ll never write about 2019 and 2020. The novel coronavirus has probably produced more global anxiety, depression, stress, and grief than just about any other single event I can think of right now in my lifetime. It has brought so many in the global community together in our isolation from even the closest neighbours. Yana is back to chat about how the pandemic has affected her personally. We talk about emotional intelligence, coping strategies, what advice we’d give ourselves in the past, and my personal views on grief as a response to searching for meaning, value, and celebration of those we love. Get ready to call your loved ones and remind them how special they are; you might find yourself reaching for the phone after this session of Intimate Interactions. Link for petition - Petition/List of Demands Fundraiser to support prisoners and their families in Ontario:

  • Crime and Self Relationship (Yana Skorstengaard)

    Crime and Self Relationship (Yana Skorstengaard)

    18/07/2020 Duração: 58min

    Today, Yana Skorstengaard, a masters candidate at the University of Ottawa in criminology discusses how we relate to crime and are intimate with the criminal punishment. It has the power to come into our lives and take everything we have. We trust that it will be just and fair with us even though we know it isn’t like that with lots of other people. Why do we assume we’ll be treated fairly? Is it only white folks who assume they’ll be treated fairly? We have a good conversation that I’m excited to share with you.

  • Healing from Traumatic Power Exchange (Jazz Goldman)

    Healing from Traumatic Power Exchange (Jazz Goldman)

    11/07/2020 Duração: 01h10min

    Trauma is everywhere, even in power exchange. Relationships can be traumatic, and total power exchange is no different. Healing can take years and adversely affect relationships, kink, and sex. When processing trauma, I think it’s important to work through any mistaken beliefs first, and to come to different conclusions about yourself before moving on. I’ve found cognitive behavioural therapy to be helpful in changing those beliefs in myself. I also didn’t find CBT healed much other than offering me some peace from the harm I was continuing to visit upon myself. When processing through the experience again, I was mindful first not to overwhelm my body with trauma, but rather to fill it with only the portion of the trauma I could safely process at once, using breathing and mindfulness to help anchor myself and control the experience. Those are also skills I learned with a counsellor - a somatic therapist this time. Finally, I try to put myself in a place that’s beautiful and can stimulate me in an aesthetic wa

página 1 de 5